is your mom at the bar?
What did we do last night that was yellow?
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
There r osticjed everywhere
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize
