And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
