Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize
