And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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