the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
