She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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