When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
You need Xanax blowdarts
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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