real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Randomize