Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
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