I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
