I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
