i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
In other news, I just burned my penis
I pour the whiskey from now on
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
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