I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
