How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
