If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Randomize