bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
