no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Randomize
