He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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