Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Randomize
