Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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