She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
I walked into a room this morning and someone asked how my back was because I apparently threw myself off the porch after attempting to set myself on fire. Who the fuck let drunk me play with fire?!
Better question: who the fuck planted a tree next to the porch?!
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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