i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Randomize
