Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
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