we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
