Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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