At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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