She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Randomize
