I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize