her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
