honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Randomize
