is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
he had hair everywhere except his balls
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
