i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
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