she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
