official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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