is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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