In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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