just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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