16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Randomize
