from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Randomize
