I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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