a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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