I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Randomize
