U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
