from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
