(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Randomize
