My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize