dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
I just got carded by a ten year old.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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