Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
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