Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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