Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
