i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Boobs are out for the taking
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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